untitled

when you have very big feelings
& by that I mean:
enormous, crushing, raucous,
crushing, loud –
what you want to do
is shut them down.

what this means is when i am with you,
i feel nothing,
i am not here,
& my heart hurts less
for now.

copyright: rebecca leathem 2016

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asylum

I was the most precious angel

tho’ I felt more crazy than that.

 

I dumbed myself down

to the helpless girl –

those adult things aren’t for me.

 

the grief had the strangest

character,

it slowed time to

the point of incapacitation.

 

my self: crushed & broken,

not forever –

just for now.

 

copyright rebecca leathem 2016

post

from B
notes on a party
fancy dress, cross dressing
a house fire
parentals to stay
& aroha

from K
dated 1986
before she got sick
plans for university
news of a boyfriend
a holiday, sport, hope

from R
word that
women at IBM
aren’t allowed to wear
low backed dresses
or trousers.

 

copyright rebecca leathem 2016